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[kanzenkakuritsu]

I find myself in a predicament.

While Atobe made a valid point that professional athletes must look the part - I just realised that I have absolutely no idea how to model anything. Actually, I have no knowledge of fashion in the slightest.

This may be a problem.

Does anyone have any data that may be useful on this subject?

Comments

[rinhirakoba]

How are you with casual physical contact, hun?

Oh, Eishirou's helping you? That's... certainly a good place to start.

[kanzenkakuritsu]

I don't... mind it.. I suppose...? As long as it's not sexual in nature. That.. makes me feel odd. I'm fine if I know it will happen beforehand or if I'm asked. I can be prepared for it that way.

Aa he offered his help as a fashion design student. I thought it would be helpful to gather data from both him and Atobe as well as other sources I find on my own. Though I believe it is largely for my modelling and professional image that I am seeing the both of them.

I believe this shopping trip is for more... casual... clothing? Am I correct?

[rinhirakoba]

Oh good. I should warn you in advance then that I may accidentally touch you. I do it without thinking now.

Yes this trip is just for more casual clothes.

[kanzenkakuritsu]

Aa. That's fine. As long as I know in advance. Now that I do, I won't worry about what it means or why you're doing it. I'll simply know that it is part of who you are. That's quite easy to accept. I'm glad you told me. Thank you.

All right. Let me know when you would like to go?

[rinhirakoba]

Well. Some people could take it to mean more and that's okay as well. But yes, physical contact is just very natural between friends.

It's a bit of a last minute thing, but I do need those pyjamas. Tomorrow?

[kanzenkakuritsu]

Friends? You.. I? You want to be my friend?

Tomorrow is fine. I'm free.

[rinhirakoba]

Ah... perhaps I'll answer after we hang out tomorrow. I think you should be able to determine by yourself if you consider individuals friends though, hun.

Lovely. I look forward to it.

[kanzenkakuritsu]

It's not that, I just.. never had many people think of me as a friend. I feel it's presumptuous to assume I am someone's friend as well. I cannot determine whether I mean enough to a person to be their friend so unless they specifically tell me that they're my friend, I just assume I am not.

When it comes to determining whether or not I consider someone a friend... if I'm honest, I don't really understand relationships between people. I have managed to make some friends since returning to Japan and I am happy about it, I think. I think that is what the emotion I feel is. It feels warm and like the opposite of lonely. Sometimes it squeezes so tight it is difficult to breathe. I feel as though, if I can speak to someone in real life and they can tolerate me... and I don't feel overly anxious... then I would like to be their friend and spend time with them and help them in any way my capabilities would allow. However.. expressing all of that is... on the whole impossible and more likely to make someone have a bad opinion of me as most of my good intentions appear untoward. So I just wait until they offer their friendship. That way I can simply agree and quietly return it in my own way.

[rinhirakoba]

Well, I think people have different levels of friendship. My feelings for someone like... say, Eishirou are quite different for someone like... Oshitari-kun, just on the basis of how long we've known each other and been friends.

I think you might have sone troubles as people don't normally just ask to be friends. It's more of a natural progression of enjoying spending time with each other and liking them for what they bring to your life. Perhaps you should try that definition.

[kanzenkakuritsu]

Oh. Mn. I see. I don't think I bring much to anyone's life. I should go and assess what I do for the people who currently think of me as a friend.. and how spending time with me could be made more enjoyable.

Should I meet you at the mall at a specific time tomorrow?

[rinhirakoba]

Ah... it's not so much about doing things for your friends. Don't feel obligated to do anything for the sake of making friends...

Maybe 2pm? We could meet near the Santa area? I should be pretty easy to spot.


ooc: log? :D

[kanzenkakuritsu]

Oh no not for making them. Just.. I want to be a good friend. I want to try my best for people that have enough faith in me to believe I could be a friend to them. That's all.

Sounds good. I'm sure I will be too.

[ooc: sure, poke me on AIM hehe ]